Life as we know it.

A few things in my life feel like they became irrelevant on Wednesday.  Here is a small list, in no particular order:

1.  My subscription to Runner's World
2.  My seven passenger mini van
3.  Pinterest
4.  My leisure time.
5.  Feeling like I am in control of my life.

I think those are the main ones that come to mind.  A few others float into my mind, then float back out almost as fast.  The ability to focus is temporarily missing too.

For about a year now, I've wanted to have another baby.  It's hard to narrow down exactly what it was that most compelled me towards that decision.  I think it mostly felt like a constant thought.  Like a thought you have at the tip of your tongue, like you feel like you need to tell to your most significant other, often and repeatedly.  My significant other wasn't on the same thought.  He was certain I was having a mid-life crisis.  Maybe he thought I was ungrateful for this priceless gift of time together that we've been given since moving here to Chapel Hill.  Maybe he thought I wasn't able to appreciate or live "in the moment" enough.  Or mostly, he was probably being a little more rational than me.  It really did feel like my new thought was a glassal disruption in the system.  A tsunami type storm, in an otherwise peaceful sea.  Why did I need to rock the boat?!

To be totally honest, I don't even know how Darin's thought process on the subject went.  All I know is that one day, he agreed with me.  I never looked back, flinched, second guessed or inquired.  I just moved forward.

I got pregnant.

We were pretty excited.  We had a new vision of our future.  It involved a bustling but manageable family of seven with five years of overlapping togetherness.  Then slowly, one by one, and then two by two, they would start leaving, but we'd have one more to hang on to, to stay young with, to continue to grow as parents with.  It felt so beautiful and right.

I knew that there was a slight chance it could be twins again, 8% to be exact.  Our first set of twins were completely spontaneous and unexpected.  But honestly, it felt so spectacular that it would happen again that I seriously didn't worry about it.  My sister-in-law who is married to Darin's brother, she has two sets of twins sandwiching the two singletons that she had.  That is a remarkable story.  I've told it often and repeatedly to anyone who wanted to listen to twin stories.  I knew that she took the double twins for this family.  I just KNEW it.  Another sister-in-law had twins, but then had two singleton births after.  Never repeating her tricky twin trick.  I felt very confident.

Darin had to leave town, but I had my first OB appointment.  I contemplated momentarily changing the appointment, but then decided there would be nothing that would require Darin's attention at this first appointment, and so I went alone.

After going over my complete OB history with the doctor, she agreed that we should do an ultrasound to simply rule out the nagging possibility of there being two babies in there.  She was so certain that we would find only one, that she was making Las Vegas jokes about odds, and gambling.  I was laughing right along with her, because I'm totally a numbers girl.  I get 8%.  I know what that means!  She starts scanning the uterus.  A baby is found.  A heart beat is found.  There is measuring taking place, and other scanning.  But it was really weird because almost every time she tried to focus on the one baby and the one heart beat, the screen kept trying to be split with what appeared to be another baby sac.  And then suddenly I saw two beating heart beats on her screen, AT THE SAME TIME.  I said, "What are we seeing?!  Why does it look like there are two?  That can't be right.  That just can't be right.  What are the odds?!  I mean, I know the odds!  Why does it look like two heart beats?"

She totally froze.  She was more shocked than me.  She said, "Let's not jump to any conclusions.  I'm not sure if I'm reading this right.  Let's bring in another doc.  She's better at reading these early ultrasounds than me.  Just wait here, and do not panic."  But she froze the image on the screen.  The one that looked like two babies, two sacs and two heart beats.

Unbelievable.

The other doctor walked in, did a quick look at the screen and said, "Yep, that's two".

I don't really remember the rest of it.  I was so shocked and confused and busy trying to remember why Darin wasn't there.  And I kept thinking the ultrasound machine was broken.

Obviously, it is meant to be.  Two are coming together, again.  And that is how it's supposed to be.  And we are thrilled, and blessed, and excited.  But the shock is just so shocking.  And the shifting of perspective takes times.

So many new things to worry about.  So many things to wonder about.  Two babies need to now arrive here safely and well.  One body needs to do that for them.

I've only cried once.  It was after I read a note from my parents about how much they loved me, and how proud of me they were, and how they knew I could do this.  I had to cry then because it's going to be hard, but we're going to do this again.

Darin's still out of town.  Won't be back until next week sometime.  We chat here and there.  Every time the conversation inevitably comes back to, "how did this happen?".  Or the other variation of our conversation is, "Did this really happen?  Is this real?".

I had to send him the picture.  The one I have taped up in the kitchen, that I look at five times an hour, just to remind myself that this did just happen, and that this is real.  We're doing this.  Again.

We're not joking.

Darin and I had been working on a little something for a while.  On Valentine's Day, we decided to let the kids in on our surprise.

I baked some mini sugar cookies and put a single letter on each cookie.  If the kids could figure it out, there was a message written on those cookies...

The team got to work, cracking the code.

At this point we had to make a little correction, or else they never would have figured it out...

Until they finally got to this message:

Which at first, no one believed.  Henry declared it not possible. But then, after swearing we were not joking 100X, they finally believed us and all started smiling and laughing.

I know it's pretty early to make such an announcement.  I've only got two months under my belt, seven more to go.  But if you were judging by my belt, you wouldn't believe it's only been two months!  

This crew will welcome one more, at the end of September.  

At least we think it's one.

We will confirm this week that it's not another set of spontaneous twins.  There is a 1 in 12 chance that it is.  The boys have a $1 wager on the ultrasound outcome.  George believes it will be two.  Henry thinks there is no way we'll have two sets of twins.  According to him, "we're just not those people".

I hope he's right.

Surprise :)

7.

  There has been a lot going on here lately.

Today, my ladies turned 7.  We went out to an early dinner here with the family.  When ordering, it was asked how old they were, to which I promptly replied, "They are 6".  They both looked at me wide eyed and said, "Mom, we're 7!".

And so they are.

To celebrate, we headed up to Virginia to spend the weekend at the American Girl Store, and with their aunts, uncles and cousins.

We left promptly after the Friday night piano recital where everyone performed beautifully:

Arriving four hours later at Aunt Rachel and Uncle Ken's house.  We woke up Saturday morning to cinnamon roll waffles, and homemade pancakes.  We rendez-voued with Aunt Christine, Aunt Ie Li and cousin Mei Li at the American Girl store around 11.  It's sort of like being in an alternate reality there at the American Girl store.

Lucky for us, we were perfectly capable of handling it!

After spending HOURS in the store, picking out the perfect birthday presents, and taking all the dolls to the salon:

We really needed to be done in the American Girl world and find some real food for the real people.

Apparently the dolls were enjoying lunch just as much as the people.  Jane found the camera!

Sunday dinner at Steve and Ie Li's:

and a picture perfect cake by Aunt Rachel

Made it the perfect way to turn 7, if you ask me.  

Even though, I'm still having a really hard time wrapping my brain around that number!  Thanks to the VA crew for making it memorable.  We love you all!!

Z Sisters

Annee:

Rachel, I'm wearing the same shirt as you!

• Since the last update, we have had three weekdays of NO SCHOOL.  We've also had more rain than we've seen since the summer.  I feel like it's been a bit drab lately.  
• No subbing.  One teacher told me it's because they were doing end-of-semester testing.  All the teachers felt like they had to be at school.  On Friday I got about five calls for upcoming subbing jobs.  I guess she was right.  The teachers know when they have to be there, and know when they can take a day off.  It was nice to be at home, I won't lie.  Lots of laundry, cleaning, and quiet.  Just what I wanted.  
• I finished The Wednesday Wars, started Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet, and read Ava's Man an abridged version since that was the only thing available on Audible.  Each one of these has been an excellent book, which I would 100% recommend to anyone asking what they should read next.  All that "reading" indicates all the little tasks that I've been doing throughout my day while the kids have been at school.  It also means I started a quilt!  I'm more excited about this quilt than any other quilt in a long while.  Super excited.  Can't wait to show it. 
• Ran Monday-Thursday.  A small victory.  Saturday I took Henry on his 11-year-old Scout 5 mile hike.  
• We have four kids on basketball teams right now.  Mercifully the girls are on the same team, but still it means Monday-Thursday we have an evening activity for someone.  It is exhausting.  Saturday we had games at 10, 1 and 4.  I think our car is on auto pilot to and from the school where they have the games and practices.  If I had a dollar for every time my van drove those roads, I'd be a rich lady. 
• Friday afternoon attended the Young Author's Tea.  George, Jane and Ruby all submitted books.  Jane won a first place prize for illustrations.  Ruby won a "Best Of" award for a book about a hero.  And George won the Best OVERALL for the 4th/5th grade.  His book will get published and bound.  A hard copy will go on the shelves of their school library, and we'll get a copy for our library.  He dreams about being an author.  This is really SUCH a big deal for him.  I wanted him to win so badly, but didn't know if it was too much to hope for.  He wrote a really amazing book. Seriously.  You should read it sometime.   
• Friday night date-night was to see Iron Lady.  I think we were the only ones in the theater who were under the age of 50.  Except one young guy who looked like he had taken his grandma out on a date.  No matter, it was a good movie, if you are seeing any and all movies out right now.  I didn't know much about British history during the late 70s and throughout the 80s.  For that it was super interesting.  It's kind of a love story in the end.  Who know Margaret Thatcher was such a romantic?  

This Week:

• Hosted playdates on Monday, since there was no school and it was raining.  Had to help keep everyone occupied somehow!  
• Tuesday I got a hair cut!  Refer to photo.  If I only cut my hair every five months, I might as well cut it short.  It will be a long time before I'm back there again.  To humor the receptionist I set-up my next appointment in eight weeks.  Do people honestly get their haircut every eight weeks?!  I'll probably end up canceling it.  I cut almost all of the color out of it, and didn't put any new color in.  I'm going au-natural for a while.  Until I get depressed that my hair is a mousy brown, streaked with blondish grey.  Then I'll go back and color it. 
• Tuesday night caught the first quarter of Henry's second game of the week.  He made the first shot of the game.  I was excited.  Then I excused myself to attend book club.  All that reading has to be put to good use :) 
• Also, Tuesday morning I woke up and could not hear out of my left ear.  I spent the entire day yawning and holding my nose while blowing, trying to pop it, TO NO AVAIL.  I was so depressed about my loss of hearing that I went to bed early Tuesday night hoping that I'd sleep the ailment away.  When I woke up this morning, still only hearing out of one ear, I actually called the doctor.  I was at the doctor's office this morning at 8:45.  My ears needed to be flushed.  Who knew?!  There was so much wax and build up that came pouring out of them, that honestly I almost threw up.  I was so embarrassed.  But they assured me it was completely normal, and that they routinely flush people's ears.  Seriously?  When was the last time you needed your ears flushed?!  
• I'm subbing all day long tomorrow for the worst kindergarten class in the school.  I felt kind of bad that I hadn't subbed in so long, and kind of bad that I was enjoying my leisure time so much that I said yes, only to shortly thereafter regret having to spend my day tomorrow with so many naughty 5 year olds.  I will do many mental exercises tonight to geared up for a long day of joyful endurance.  
• Pinewood derby Saturday.  I'm supposed to be a judge of some sort.  Not for the official speed races, but for all the other categories.  Followed up by a whole afternoon of basketball games.  
• I hope I get to finish my quilt sometime in the middle of all of that.  

Ana:

Last few weeks:

-Loved having everyone in town for New Years but we missed the Wileys and Earnests.  Surprises of surprises I managed to ring the new year in awake instead of asleep in bed like normal.  I won't say I didn't miss those precious hours of sleep the following day, but it was great to be with everyone.

-Sleep training William. (Either I trained William or he trained me). It's became ridiculous that he will only nap in our arms so we did some serious sleep training which made both William and me a mess.  We didn't let him cry it out, we just put him down each time he fell asleep in our arms over and over and over again.  I am happy to report that most days he takes four naps in a crib instead of my arms so I can get some work done, make dinners, and acknowledge poor Jack's existence.  I do miss having the little snuggly guy in my arms though.  There's nothing like holding a sleeping baby.

-Sent Jack back to school after the long winter break.  He was a little less excited to go to school then I would have expected him to be.  I guess days full of beaches, family, bowling, wii, zoos, etc don't make school seem so appealing.  I on the other hand was happy to see it start up again.

-Had a major malfunctioning week that included driving my car into the garage with the surfboards on the roof, breaking the surfboard and our garage.  Not my best week.

 -Made the s'mores cookies on Annees blog.  Darn all the yummy things in this world making me have to stay in my big girl pants :).  I didn't have Hershey bars so I ran out to the 7 eleven and behaved like such a moron the guy behind the counter wanted to make sure I was ok.  Yes, I am just that tired.

-I see babies younger then William and I want more babies.  I want to do it all over again and it makes me question my sanity.  With Jack I cried till he turned one if anyone even mentioned me having another baby so this is new territory for me.

-Our house finally went dark after Christmas.  It was just time.

-Finally accepted that I wasn't getting a Christmas card out this year, or even a birth announcement.  Sad, but true.

-Jack turned 6.  I told him weeks ago that if he wanted to stay home on his birthday he could, but he insisted he wanted to go to school.  Then the morning of, when he was dressed and ready for the day and about to head out to the car he told me he changed his mind and wanted to stay home.  Zack was home for the day too so it was spent playing football, playing wii, going bowling, going to the arcade, opening present after present (I really have present giving issues with my kids), eating in-n-out, eating rubios, baking and eating cake, and cookies.  It was a lovely peaceful day and I am so grateful for each moment I get to be Jack's mom.  (yes, even the yucky ones).

-Finished West Wing.  We loved this series and I hate that it's over.  What are we going to do with our lives now?

This week:

-Exercise

-Work

-Avoid blogs that post yummy recipes...

-Try to set up more play dates for Jack so when summer comes it will feel more normal and regular to meet up with his friends.

Sarah:

Last Week(s):

• Found out we're having a BOY!!! June and Scott were really rooting for a girl (or two), so there was some slight disappointment, but both are coming around now. Naming a boy is hard.
• Finished Brenden's Science Fair Project - testing angles of trajectory using a potato cannon. Mostly it was just an excuse to build a potato cannon, but we found some science in there to justify it.
• Lower Lights meeting to plan out shows and recording for the upcoming year.
• Moved Huck out of his crib into a bed in June's room. So far so good, although it is IMPOSSIBLE when he's napped during the day so around 6pm I have to really focus on keeping him awake (and try not to drive anywhere)
• Started watching Downton Abbey (on Netflix) - many of our artsy friends were telling us it was great, and we resisted for a while but now are hooked too.
• Bought a new pair of maternity skinny jeans. I love our sharing system since it makes me feel like splurging for a few nice pieces is ok since I get so much for free already. I might be coming back around to the full-panels, although bottom line is there is really no way to keep the pants up no matter what. Can't wait for spring when I can wear skirts all the time.
• Took the kids swimming on Saturday to the indoor pool in Lehi.
• Made cookies - believe it or not it's been long enough this is actually a noteworthy list item
• Took advantage of an especially warm day to take down more outdoor Christmas decor. Back to cold wet snow now.
• This is such a boring list. My life feels rather blah right now.

This Week:

• Brenden starts the process of getting braces
• Major grocery shopping and laundry needs
• Send out 1099s to people we paid for work with The Lower Lights or The Rooftop Concert Series last year
• Oli needs new church shoes. Brenden needs new snowboarding boots. Remember when you could just shop for fun? I hate business shopping. Although now that I know I'm having a boy maybe I can justify improving Huck's wardrobe a bit.
• Plan a trip with Scott. We desperately need a getaway. Doesn't have to be fancy. Just something to mix things up a bit and to look forward to.
• Get a massage - Scott bought me a gift certificate so I need to take advantage! I'm usually not much of a massage person, but it sounds pretty nice right about now.

Rachel:

Last 2 weeks:

• We made it to SLC for the wedding.  The visit was way too short but I'm glad we got down to Provo for at least a couple hours.  It was fun to visit dad in his new office.  The building is very Mad Men.  Thanks for letting us stay mom and dad.  
• Sunday we had the missionaries over for dinner.  I made BBQ chicken salad and the CPK tortilla soup.  It was good.  I was wishing I had mom's plates which are oval-ish and have a spot for a bowl.  Our table it a bit too small for plates and bowls all together.  I'll keep my eye out for those unique place settings.  
• Finally updated my phone to iOS 5.  It took an entire day, but I can iMessage you all now, whatever that means.  
• Team lunch on Tuesday.  This busy season, we're planning to take one evening off per week.  So Mondays I will leave at 430pm and I'm not supposed to work for the rest of the night.  Sounds like a fun experiment!  I chose Monday b/c that's volleyball day, and by the end of the week work things have backed up so an evening off then would be more stressful than relaxing as I worry how everything will get done.
• Another work lunch at Cafe Rio one day.  So great that it's close enough now!  
• Two dates this weekend just because.
• Saturday I went through the barn sale circuit with Dawn.  I was searching for an organizational solution to our front door area where we drop all our junk.  I think I found some good things.
• Before I left town for SLC, I was awoken in the night by a huge loud crash and breaking sound.  Ken was already out of town so I was too freaked out to investigate what happened.  Turns out the shelf we put up in the laundry room had fallen down along with all its contents.  Note to self: don't store heavy paint cans on a top shelf!  Anyway, Ken rebuilt the shelf this week and added a second shelf underneath only for laundry supplies.  Next we need to a row of hooks to the wall behind the door.  I love the shelves soooo much.  They are so functional and organized and make me happy.  
• Did I mentioned we've been asked to attend a marriage class during the second hour at church?  There are about 8 young couples who attend.  So far it's been pretty fun.  I teach the 5 year olds now and Ken is in Elder's Quorum.  
• Listened to the Mormon Stories podcast about this former seminary teacher who left the church.  It was interesting and sad and frustrating at the same time.

This Week:

• Monday I'm supposed to leave at 430.  We'll see how that goes!
• Looking at my agenda book, I can't really see much going on this week at all.  
• Plan Superbowl party type treats to bring to a work party on next Friday.  Any ideas?  I'm leaning towards making these bite-sized baked bries.  Aren't they cute?
• Hopefully CZ will come back to the office and we can all go to lunch.
• Re-paint my nails.
• Find an eye doctor and make an appointment.  Headaches every night now.
• Deep clean my makeup/get ready area.  This requires throwing out half of the old makeup and samples I've accumulated over time.  Hard to do.
• Make Beouf Bourguignon one day.  Probably Sunday.
• I'd like to invite my 2 VTees over with their husbands for dinner.  That would be 6 people total.  We can only fit 4 at the little round kitchen table.  Is it weird if we invite people over and then have 4 at the table and Ken and I sit at the coffee table or at the island?  Should we invite them over for snacks and games instead?  Or we could bring in some kind of card table that possibly all 6 of us could fit at?  While I love our little place, it's really annoying and awkward that we can't ever invite anyone over.  Especially after people have invited us over and the natural thing would be to return the invitation.  But if they have lots of kids and such, there just really isn't a lot of space or anything fun for kids to do. And there isn't a way to say can just you and your husband come over or something.  Anyway...
• Ken and I would really love to start Crossfit again this week.  Hopefully there will be time.  

Ie Li:

Last Week:

• I kept up with the laundry.  I am pretty good about doing one load of laundry from start to finish each day.
• I cleaned a lot.
• Finished the second season of Sherlock with Steve.  Oh, it's so good.
• Finished Peace Like a River. Oh my goodness, I loved this book.  It was beautifully written and talked about faith in a way that I believe anyone could appreciate it.  It was wonderful.
• I resumed Cutting for Stone, and so far, I am enjoying it very much.
• Ie Ling stayed with me for the weekend while her hubby was out of town.
• Ie Ling watched our kids Friday night so we could go on a date.  We picked up Steve's new glasses and went to the Cheesecake Factory for appetizers.
• We surprised Ie Ling by bringing Ie Mei home from our Friday night date.  Ie Mei flew in just for the weekend and it was wonderful.  We spent all day Saturday shopping at the outlets.  Clothes shopping is expensive and difficult in Mexico City, so we spent the majority of the time outfitting Ie Mei.  We had great success.

This Week:

• Visiting teaching
• Organize pantry
• Get to bed early.  Steve and I discussed our game plan for this busy season at length and concluded it would be best for him to get on the get to bed early/wake up early schedule.  This morning, he got out of the house really early before the kids got up, worked out at the gym in his office building, and was able to start work by 7:30.  Seems like a good strategy to me.
• Resume parent/child dates.  The kids have been asking to start them up again.
• Go on another date with Steve.

Christine:

p.s. I texted her last night trying to encourage her to send in an update.  This is what she said:

"I will try.  I've just been there(at work) 8:30am to at least 9pm every night.  And I'm sitting right next to my manager always so it's hard to do anything other than work on my computer." 

And I haven't heard from her again since.  She sounds busy.  Rachel, take an action shot of her at the office:-)

More Evidence That Pinterest Is Making Me Fat.

It's starts innocently enough.  Someone pins something.  I repin it.  In this case, it was my sister Christine.  Darn her.

Source: the-girl-who-ate-everything.com via Annee on Pinterest

It usually ends the same way too.  A few days later, I find myself in the kitchen making a devilishly delicious treat.  Of which I will consume entirely too much.  Darn consuming too much.

These were delicious, for real.  You put down a layer of graham crackers.  Then, you mix up this cookie dough concoction.  Then, you spread it over the graham crackers and partially bake it.  Take the tray out of the oven, and press a hershey square into it.  

Darn delicious.

In other news, George turned 10.  I'm totally going to give him his own birthday post.  I PROMISE!

And Henry went to a UNC Basketball clinic where he got to spend an afternoon working with the UNC coaches and players:

Which apparently is a really big deal when you are 12, LOVE basketball, UNC, and all things related to either one.  Well, I mean as big of a deal as anything can be when you are 12, and mostly too cool for anything to be a big deal.

But in the mean time, Ruby decided she wanted the same haircut as Jane.  Believe me, I tried to talk her out of it.  But Darin insisted she be allowed to have full ownership over her own hairstyle.  I guess it's good kids have both a mom AND a dad.

We're back to people not being able to tell them apart.  Which apparently is exactly what they were going for...

(More details about their dresses can be found over at MOM)

Untitled.

Sometimes Christmas Eve is almost more magical than Christmas.  The anticipation is so contagious, and sometimes impossible to top.  Nothing makes my life more sweet than being a mother at Christmas time.  Yeah, it's totally exhausting.  I was sick for the entire week after Christmas because of all the lost sleep.  But they totally make it worth it:

This is our last Christmas without a teenager.

Time goes by too fast.

(George is six days old in that photo!)

Know what I mean?!

I try to believe that I'm constantly trading in something that is good, for something that is better.  

I hope I'm right. 

Things sure are pretty good.

Merry Christmas.

Ballet away.

Took these girls to their first live performance of The Nutcracker.  

That was a really great idea!

Thank you UNC for bringing such beautiful performance right to my backyard.  

Tonight they were full of plans for tutus and dancing, just as I suspected they'd be.

Lovely.